021013 - return of the dog/blog

so life of a dog returns this week after a 3 week hiatus during which your canine protagonist has been 'pursuing other projects' so numerous since the last episode (which, apologies, was not a finale of any sort) that even listing them would leave us with not enough room for the credits to roll. 

new readers; all you need to know is that names are substituted and fictionalised, the prize for spotting yourself is a postcard.

so in the quickest of flashes it was three years later and the life of this dog continued 4 miles west to the queen of catchers favourite gin based homestead, with politics, key (formerly known as glasgow), hills and dunlop (but only on bill withers terms).

finding out what doesn't grow on trees probably brought the worst obligation of the summer, with a maximum stay at a caravan in my former homeland coming to an end on 111013, before in much happier times life of a dog relocates to glasgow for two months (the reason for the earlier name change) and also for this time will be life of a jackal, which is much the same in the same way that it's not. 

previous events will be alluded to and described in flashback style like the way that other shows do to illustrate a long jump in between series, like showing one of the main characters now long haired and/or bearded and imagining making a box. however, with dunlop today gone to the city of love and dodger dodgin' our plans with a filthy cold, life of a dog will resume in its reported format in a few days, or tomorrow. 

welcome back.

070610-190610

so, life of a dog has perhaps made it's most comparatively drastic change in between series (not ignoring the after school specials that have peppered the spring), with new characters, new settings, and finer weather.

first, the escape from the house of vanity into the sea of blue, where my canine soul was restored, albeit to start with involving so much artificial light i almost tried to do blackouts in my own life. however, this did not draw from the ever rising sun and the more concise introduction of further characters, or in one case a transformation that would have made plato proud.

so for one example the literal raising of a bar blurred the sights of some of even the finest, with (deep breath) acre, toffee, h20, ma, dodger, emo, mdma, ussr, rodeo, fruitcake, and many many others stumbling home.

however, fast forward an indeterminate amount of time to almost a hollywood return of model, grr, brazil, redditch, darling, sorel and camberwell which prompted much barking and a warming of my cold canine heart at the sight of their mirrored smiling faces (some all the way from the stone village).

but even this was not enough said the sun (including hat), to which i replied 'surely not?' (not speech marks because being a metaphorical conversation i didn't actually 'say' that). and so with a backdrop of my ever favourite mythical creature based left turn, life of a dog saw the return of dubstep, curly, glue, k-swiss, giz, and jail(!) at the beginning of an evening (it was still light and the score was still 0-0) that i can't recall the end of? although unfortunately i think because of my sleepy eyes failing to capture memories after too much walkies.

although of course, there is always a cloud looming at the edge of the blue sky, with the last sightings of edinburgh and glue until at least 210710 (thats an easy one) with curly, belltower politics, hooplah and other in attendance as they are now over where war is cold.

all was not lost though, as i promised to keep a ticket warm for them and others for my transformation of 51 to 73 over 2 and a 1/2 at 1800250710.

maybe a real story next time? maybe a real story next time.

xx

060610

apologies faithful readers - first for the lack of posting in a rather long time, and second for the poor fragment i bring to you today. not only was this written between deptford and camberwell on 2 buses but times have indeed changed since. however, this might serve as food for thought for a currently in production work to be published soon.

so with the return of life of a dog's main cast for more than fleeting visits, stories may have been taking place before your very eyes albeit not in black and white like me. so to recap we will choose some of the finer cuts from this... Time.
but first, a digested summary should you be in a hurry and hungry for metaphors;
back to the future which looks an awful lot like the past but with more degrees, spent mostly rolling to and on fields of hills, absorbing d and introducing a new generation for broadcasting after school, making eyes at glue, running in circles, fixing holes in the sea of blue, returning to a new present far from the house of vanity.

however this does seem quite succinct and more accurate than i remember with the only addition maybe being

the continuous 925 rolling on in the downtime between series (trailers are already being screened) with dangerous waters lapping at my paws and sunshine being sometimes all too prevalent. suburban cities - it's my turn now.

do tell if you understood less than usual in this post. or too much? adjustments might be made accordingly.

x

020410

so i feel i must write something at least alluding to an apology for the hasty introduction of new characters. last week's post was something of a spin-off while most of the main cast were 'pursuing other projects' - however i felt this should not delay the new series a moment longer.

and so with somewhat of a surprise came a return of so many characters yesterday evening it was almost an 'after school special', except this is not the perfect description, because the night ended in a trip to some fabricated existence where 'no dogs allowed' reigned supreme and took me elsewhere (namely to a welcoming rarely involving only model and darling).

and so returned friday (also the day that the house of vanity reveals to us all our captive hours for the next week) and me to the 10pm world in the real world circa midday.

but this was no sooner endured than i rolled forth on jay (for older readers, jay has replaced robin. for new readers, both are bicycles) to the ladywellcoming home of curly. before being joined by most of the previous night's clientele including maths, fire, glasgow, dubstep, giz, politics, happy, kangaroo, politics and several others.

now i've never been very good at moving on to a new day with any sort of panache 0r grace so please turn to page 12:45030410 where i rejoined some of the spin off cast. and shortly afterward with the briefest of racing pitstops i was once again flying toward nukes. and i was not disappointed but treated a (further reduced) cast complete with a spread fit for several kings laid on by our dance music named host.

apologies for missing fragments, speedy jumps, vague descriptions and repeated words, as this entry was written; on my phone on a bus, then outside a video shop, and on a bit of newspaper on the train.

x

290310

so with an impressive two requests for a more uptodate insight in to the life of a dog, we meet again.

to begin, something i paw'd into my telephone whilst sitting on some steps.

....so this morning at the kind of time i would describe in nothingy conversations as 'too early' despite it being nothing of the sort, i dragged my paws more than usual toward the aforementioned house of vanity. however, i put this reluctance down to the prevention of a second motor oil strength coffee by the blight of toothpaste and marched myself with forced vigour in to the dragon's frat house.

so after approximately 4.2 moments of deja vu exactly 70 minutes apart, i emerged with the firm belief that one day never returning would save my soul. so later this was followed by a night of irresistible bargains and a 16 flashbacks to the time before the time before when i was still in uniform, but these were welcome and not too plentiful.

and with no more than a blink i was rolling quickly towards the sea of blue, to learn something about ropes near a car park. and while the comfort of familiar faces was a nice surprise, i almost made it through the day without so much as a false step, before metaphorically barking too loudly when prompted out of the sea of blue.

so continued the weekend on to our favourite bridge with jammy dodger, ma, bnbn, r2d2, fruitcake and others, still only five days since our beloved family had arrived in california.

welcome back wandering soldiers.

x

161109

here we have an excerpt from life of a dog that didn't make it to the publish button.

approx, 4 months ago.

and then came the storm to shatter the very foundations of your favourite dog and inject another 365 of limbo before the fog thickens and events can not be predicted.

so it has been, i believe, 187 days since last we met. apologies for my absence, as these intervening sunrises have yielded my paws unable to type with much composure.

SO where to start? summer brought real life sunshine which i and comrades chased all the way to the east, only to find out the sun sets in the west. which it did once again so recently taking with it all the warmth on the planet and inspiring an exodus to which the likes this fair town had never seen! so onwards or backwards it was to the real world and into the not so real house of vanity, where 10pm has always arrived and never leaves. but one can not complain when the root of all evil is happy.

130509

so i know i said next week last week but as was already explained weeks in the life of a dog can be ten days. try working that out with dog years of 7 to 1. but enough about that because i have been very busy and not so busy. 

so with all my companions of almost every variety having disappeared off the face of the earth i was left to rattle around in my fortress of solitude for almost a whole solid week, emerging only to buy chocolate buttons or fight crime. this was of course broken up by a few sightings of model, grr and brazil, on one occasion where our favourite serbian establishment was kept standing only by our 4 pint glasses. and on a similar day of limited achievements, i found my calling in bar billiards with porksworth and market, which did raise my score for the day before the toppling of the centre skittle brought me back to zero. at some point in the week of wonder (nothing) on some day (i have no idea if it was before or after the aforementioned events, maybe tuesday?) me, model, grr, brazil and camberwell hit the depressed arms to see tunmills and co, whereby/fore i was impressed, almost as much as a bystander who kept saying he was so. 

then the weekend not so much as sprung upon me but faded through the mist like in a movie when people who haven't for a while meet. and after cocktails with my previously mentioned companions in the latter event plus happy and minus brazil, (keep up) it was to the hub to meet there sorel, curly, dubble, bunch, kswiss, fierce, and the rest. and later on the party not only kept on going but included your favourite canine and more cider, to the former home of samaritans minus the thermometer we all knew and loved.

so sunday was spent how sundays should be spent (sans religion) with no memorable happenings and a rollover to next week. 

monday and in a bizarre coupling of central london and robin i made the short trip to see clerk, before returning for a brief visit to the bear to pick up one mousey, who after a long spell in the shire made a welcome return. 

and then of course tuesday i began to earn my bread selling drums underground, while seeing waiting for godot and still waiting myself too for one half of the decision making professional liars to post my life plans, before saturdays torture for the other half. 

sorry to be so exhaustive, quality control will return to your screens soon readers. i'll get jurassic 5 to set me straight.

more NEXT WEEK.

030509

so hello again. i know it has been several weeks since a proper post but i can assure you there is reason enough involving auditions holding my thoughts and dogs can only think about one thing at once. so to return to the rails we will be stopping only at milestones that may not even be milestones in the usual sense of the word but events i choose to regain from mother time.

so i believe we left off with my parting note before i stood with possibly the most famous bear, or marmalade eating bear we all know and love at early o clock. 150 miles or so later and me and mousey were being ever so civilised with cream tea. which was certainly a marvellous beginning to my weekend in the country, including the most relevant sports and walks around a castle etcetera. 

meanwhile or rather after in the big city i was put on trial in the only store where you are encourage to hit stuff with sticks and later lifted out of the abyss crunching many of our fellow citizens and into hibernation for 5 of 7 from 9 til 6  from 110509. 

so after a joyous weekend including lunch with the extended fam, i paid a last courtesy visit to the ironically named job centre with the good news and proud we are of all of that. then it was to the hob to say farewell to jew with ecowarrior, bunch, curly, crusader, fierce, dubble, k-swiss, belltower, flan, and others. which was lots of fun. (apologies, the only two adjectives i could think of just there were marvellous and fun. deary me)

i believe the next day was the day me and mousey made the pilgrimage back to the source of our knowing and learning to see jammy dodger and co kill some cats (it was a play in case you are worried), followed by the seasonal life admin we all have to endure that no one notices. a haircut, dear watson.

and of course yesterday was the source of all my previous distractions where i was put under the scrutiny of professional liars showing them how well i could do it too and trying to avoid small talk during the waiting to be shot. but things went to plan so far, so now we wait for my life plan to come in the post.  

very sorry to be quite so vacantly. undescriptive. but 3 weeks contained so much activity that i have forgotten alot of it. next weeks post will indeed be next week and will certainly contain backtobasics new series type writings, with events described in full as i have been advised and maybe even some profiles of characters in my life. so look out for you may be the subject. or maybe not, i don't know. check on.... thursday? or whatever. 

welcome back.

x

160409

back on sunday.

120409 easter special

so, i hear you cry, wherefore has life of a dog been? over two weeks without a proper post i'm sure has left you feeling lost and stuff, so i'll try and make this an extra bumper and cryptic post. if i don't, well, you get what you pay for. this might be long so why not have a cup of tea. although you might have finished reading by the time the kettle boils. made a decision? sitting comfortably? then i'll begin.

so we shall begin with the ever so civilised visit to what could be called pieces by eight, an art exhibition slightly above the glowing 'take courage' sign we all know and love if you live near new cross. this was then followed the next morning by a not so inspiring visit to the place where no working man sets foot for a 13 week review and an application to the other side of the desk.
my apologies for seemingly fastfowarding through events so long ago, one dog can only remember so many things. and the tape of life does all too often get chewed up by the proverbial player (time) without capturing aids such as solid film or commitment to diary.

SO suddenly the weekend was upon us even though every day is so, and it was up to the centre of the big smoke for various errands, made more pleasant by a chance encounter with a kangaroo and a rendezvous with clerkenwell. 10 points if you spotted a new character, there will be more.

forty eight hours later, to skip past a blurry saturday, and it was up to birmingham for a token visit less than a stones throw from where last your favourite blogger stayed with 3 other partners in crime. certainly a blast from the past considering the disappearance of the two that aren't mousey.

back on track with the memory banks now, the beginning of the week brought singing lesson followed by a quick hang five with jammy dodger, flowera and lbc. but with monday being busy on the phone to sunday it was time to give tuesday a long call.
up at 15 minutes before dawn, it was straight on the bus to sidcup. after a test in movement voice singing and playing and an hour waiting to be shot, this canine escaped the chop to be given the lovely gift of one months waiting.
howbeit, there was no time for fussing as robin and i hit the high road for 7 miles all the way to the ton of bricks, where to witness the musings of some clever friends i met camberwell, tunmills, sorel, model, grrrr, bruv, brazil, curly, screech, stud, various, pseacher, and special appearances from redditch and darling (who you may have seen referred to as liverpool). then of course an all too tired dog made the return journey to clock up the 14 miles and flopped straight to sleep.

so all too suddenly we were midweek and with the aid of a train and robin it was back not quite so far away but in the same direction to not quite pecknam but sort of nunhead, to yet again say an all too soon farewell to redditch and darling.
nevertheless this was soothed by the long awaited return of one mousey who had finally tired of sliding down hills.

now relax reader because the home run is just over the sunrise as we approach the present day. i promise. so thursday spins past with nothing remarkable apart from a game of spoons without the drinking element at curly's, before friday where it was back to (ladywell) said house (twice) for a birthday extravaganza (for smarrisey) with (deep breath....) curly (obviously), scotty, smarrisey, mousey, glasgow, politics, johnger, dubble, flan, belltower, cambridge, jew, bunch, and others from my favourite time of day to my favourite time of night.

so apart from an honest days work and another hangout just like the first of this post, we arrive at todays holiday and the reason for this after school/holiday special, upon which i have eaten substantial amounts of chocolicious eggs.

i do hope you feel better now, and up to speed. there will be a pop quiz when you least expect it. not really. unless.. no. no homework this week cos its been a long one. life of a dog will be back sooner than later. when does that mean? we'll see.